Upcoming Competitions

The deadlines are fast approaching for applications to upcoming Pole Dancing Competitions for which Canadian citizens are eligible:

North American Pole Dance Competition: Applications due May 31, Competition August 24-26
This one is held in Chicago and has an "Elite" (read Semi-Pro/Pro) National division open for residents of USA, Canada, and Mexico. The States are teaming with awesome competitions from coast to coast, but they are all open to US residents only. The one ugly thing about this competition is a 20 second floor work requirement; this is pole dancing, people, hence a pole should be the only thing required!

Canadian Pole Fitness Association Championships: Applications start May 1, Competition August-October
This is the Big Kahuna! A series of competitions held all around Canada, that later converge in October to bring you the new and improved Miss Pole Dance Canada, this year held in Toronto. The winner of this one get to go to World's. You can apply to multiple divisions, but only in one region, so don't get too excited. More info and a more detailed schedule:

1. British Columbia – September 15th, 2012 Campbell River
2. Alberta – Date TBA
3. Saskatchewan – Online Only
4. Manitoba – Online Only
5. Ontario – September 29th, 2012 Ottawa
6. Quebec – August 19th, 2012 Montreal
7. New Brunswick – Online Only
8. Newfoundland/Labrador – Date TBA
9. Nova Scotia – Date TBA
10. Prince Edward Island – Online Only
11. Northwest Territories – Online Only
12. Nunavut – Online Only
13. Yukon – Online Only
14. Wild Card

And below are competitions for which applications are closed or which have already happened in the Glorious Nation of Canada:

National Capital Pole Fitness Competition: Applications November 2011, Event February 2012
This one is complete B.S. There is nothing national about it since it was ever only open to students of some dinky studio in Ottawa. The prizes: memberships at this studio. It's a recital at best, a not so clever marketing ploy at worst.


Toronto Pole Dance Fitness Showcase: Applications closed, Competition May 6
I saw a juicy little string on a PD forum where the organizers of this competition were going off on Tammy Morris, the organizer of Miss Pole Dance Canada, shouting how they can't set up a "Miss Pole Dance Canada" competition due to her having the rights to the name. Duh? So, this competition is the alternative to Miss Pole Dance Canada. I missed the application deadline for this one back in February/March due to exams and a healing wrist injury. Also, as far as I'm aware, they had to close the applications early due to being "full". Yes, I raise my eyebrow to that, sir.


So, it is evident Canada is lacking on the competition front. What I would like to see is the studios setting up recitals and performance evenings, if not publicly, then just for friends and family. Perhaps it's just a matter of time and organizing power, which can easily be solved if I can volunteer as the catalyst...

A War on Two Fronts

Pole dancers are in the midst of a ruthless battle with the conservative, simple folk, as well as in a civil war among themselves. We have already established that pole dancing and, what some may perceive as, shocking attire are here to stay, but as a sport that is trying to gain worldwide respect (through acceptance into The Olympics, for example), its advocates have to strike a fine balance between artistic expression, athletic appearance, and historical inevitabilities.

I'd vouch that 99.9% of pole dancing competitions out there do not allow stripperesque tendencies such as thongs or the taking off of clothes, but anything beyond that, and the standards waiver. The infamous stripper shoe - or as some at the studio say "the exotic ballet shoe" - is a definite culprit. The high platformed shoe is extremely comfortable and even has a purpose in most pole moves that either involves additional ankle grip, or ability to slide easier. Artistic expression does not necessarily deem it as inappropriate, but it's ties with the seedy bars of the world most definitely don't do the sport of pole any favours as far as prestige is concerned. Most elite competitions don't allow such shoes, and elite pole athletes wouldn't dream of wearing heels for performance, as pole moves that involve foot grips become impossible, yet many competitions out there still have no restrictions towards it, and many polers take full advantage.

Then, there is the "costumes" themselves. When you are trying to maximize your skin to pole ratio, wearable attire becomes limited, and the results would make the crazies over in Kansas and Arizona plaster burkas on the poor polers. As liberals and advocates for freedom of the female form, we'd all just have a nice laugh and pull off a super-woman, into shoulder mount, into elbow hold Iron X combo, but as world stage performers, we have to think carefully. I consistently see competitions post stripperesque photographs of their competitors, or competitors wearing cheap 99 cent performance gear to the stage. Not that that is not OK, we all enjoy a bit of fantasy, but we have to laugh at our own hypocritical displays that only hinder our abilities to be taken seriously. As I said before, there is a fine balance between artistic expression and athletic exhibitionism, and many polers today lack the support and imagination to strike it. Ladies, coming up with a minimalistic costume that is both expressive and functional is not as easy as you think. If it took you a click to E-bay and 30 seconds to fill out the PayPal security form, you are probably on the wrong track.

The root of the problem lays in the lack of standards for the sport, which makes sense as, not only are female sports a fairly recent addition to the world, but this particular, practically all-female sport, is even more recent. Is poling acrobatics? Is it dancing? Is it gymnastics? It is such a versatile forum that ballroom, ballet, and jazz, combined with circus acts and pure gymnastic strength can all be found in one routine. Tango dancers are sexy and fierce, yet they are not persecuted for their tiny flirty skirts, sequins, and heels. Ballet dancers can appear to wear next to nothing, yet they are not associated with seedy downtown bars. Gymnasts are hard working individuals who give up their life for the bar or the ribbon from toddler age, yet most pole studios don't allow patrons younger than the age of 18. And then there is the can of worms that is the history of pole dancing; we don't just ignore years and years of the foundation that has given birth to this wonderful sport!

It's hard to send a clear message to the world, when the sender still hasn't come up with the code. One thing is for certain though, we all have to do our part in opening our mind and overcoming prejudices.

Get Skimpy!

Pole dancers are not ho's or nudists, we simply require as much skin as possible to be exposed in order to stick to the pole and pull off amazing acrobatics.

In the studios, the progress of the student is inversely proportional to how much clothing they wear. I currently don brief type shorts, and a sports bra with thin straps. The shorts allow me to pull off moves such as "The Apprentice" and "The Superman" without sliding, and the skinny straps allow for maximum skin contact for shoulder mounts. I even had one girl once tell me "this move is easiest in a thong, because then you can use your butt to stick to the pole". The move: a sideways split on the pole.

And believe you me, I would rather have some protection while I'm up there. Bruises and pole burn are not pleasant in feel and appearance. There are certain products that are designed for protection on the pole. Mighty Grip is a well known vendor/maker of gloves, ankle, wrist, knee, elbow, arm, thigh protection, etc. Basically, these products involve taking sport materials such as knee wraps and wrist supports, and sewing strips of vinyl or synthetic leather on them to prevent the material from sliding. But the forces that are involved on the pole are so great, that none of these products last for longer than 3-4 weeks of regular use. The entire concept is such an outrageous scam! It would be more economical and convenient if the tack strips could be easily replaced when they wear out. Plus, their so called "tack" strips are not optimized at all. The leathery material slides even more than sweaty skin, and the vinyl material is so grippy that there is no give at all, which makes flow difficult to achieve. Some people swear by Mighty Grip gloves and other accessories, but I have met much more who don't have much good to say.

The more I think about pole wear, the more I want to be involved in creating some... One thing is for certain, until someone invents a fabric that behaves like human skin, polers around the world have no other choice but to be indecent.

Burn the Bra!

So, we've established that pole dancing changes the (female) body towards a more muscular , (and hence masculine) type. However, I am sure we can all agree that a woman with prominent shoulder/back muscles, forearms, and abs, is not exactly de riguer. Tant pis, indeed.

I've heard many arguments from the average/"plus size" crowd that body trend setters such as fashion models and celebrities are "too skinny", but I haven't heard anyone endorsing an image of a more toned, muscular female body. Chiseled six packs, prominent biceps, and thighs that are shaped by squats are a rare find in the media, and the sporty woman image appears to be marketed to a niche. Skinny and weak is in, strong and confident is out.

The obvious question is, why? Having a body shaped by daily workouts that are the equivalent of lifting weights offers a multitude of benefits that aid the modern woman. Maneuvering  strollers, washing bathrooms, opening jars, carrying groceries, moving furniture, blow drying your hair, and pretty much any other physical activity that you can think of becomes significantly easier, all thanks to trained muscles that are more difficult to fatigue. Plus, the new found athleticism can be transferred to the bedroom. And of course, no more diets! Your metabolism goes into such overdrive that you can finally eat all the carbs, fat, and protein that you like (well, within limits, but more on that later). Yet, the image of a muscular woman brings shudders to many men and women alike. And we are not talking about the over-tanned, steroid pumped participants of extreme muscle competitions, but simply a finally fully functional and healthy body! Don't worry, douchebags, you will still get to gawk at hot girls, not amazons...

Whose fault is this? Everyone's! The "patriarchal society", the "media", the "fashion industry", and the women themselves are all to blame, as the list goes on. The acceptable female form has seen so many shapes and sizes throughout the centuries, that nothing is stopping us now to finally get practical!

GIFted

Looky what I found on Pleated Jeans!

That move is called "The Iguana", but there's an added flair where walking on air suddenly becomes possible. It requires good back flexibility, strength in pecks, shoulders, wrists, and abs. Definitely an advanced move. It's particularly hard to practice as the strain on your shoulders is immense, and hence you can only do it so many times before you hurt something. I still can't do it consistently, and this was actually how I hurt my left shoulder. I heard push ups help with this move. DROP DOWN AND GIVE ME 20!